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I'm not sure why but I am wondering about thoughts lately. My wife and I were discussing how much God knows last night and our little brains came up with an answer. God knows all things - His knowledge is complete. Without being too obvious this means God doesn't go to school, study or take tests to check and see if He remembers stuff. He could ace all tests and never needs to prepare, not just because He is gifted and remembers all the information but He actually KNOWS everything. What is even more interesting to me is that God knows my thoughts. God knows your thoughts too. God knows everyone's thoughts, intentions, motives, passions, emotions and desires.
I have a tendancy to share with other motorists what I think about their driving abilities. To be truthful I actually speak words by myself as I drive about those same driving abilities. God asks me to control my actions, my words and even my thoughts. Actually God asks me to submit my heart and mind to His Holy Spirit so that I can glorify Him more often than not duriing the day. I have to admit I enjoy thinking what I want, when I want and about who I want. I don't think God agrees. My mind should be so consumed with thoughts of God that I have very few moments to selfishly entertain anything else.
Jesus said"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these." (Matthew 6:27-29) Flowers and birds and fish and trees and all living things besides people are doing what they do - being themselves. We as people get to choose what to do, how to do, how to look, how to behave, how to present, how to represent, how to misrepresent, and on the list goes. Start in the mind. Fill your thought life with God, all His amazing-ness, all His glory and all His beauty and strength. Then as you act, as you speak, as you think, as you feel, as you react - God can be the starting point of all we produce. I know there are some days, well actually many days when I wish God would not know what is on my mind. That is where the choice begins - in the mind. Careful little mind what you think today, for what is in there might come out and it may not be pretty.
I was able to get to the beach last weekend. Cold, rainy but still powerful. The water was cold at first, air temperature being 70-ish. I was struck with the idea that in the ocean its hard to figure out where the water "starts" and where it "ends." Likewise in life the love of God is similar. Where does God's love start? Where does it end? Does it start or end as we, humans, understand the definition of the terms? All I know it that when I'm in a groove with God its like being in the ocean. The power of the water and the submission one needs to apply make the experience unforgetable. The ocean and God are quite unexplainable. That's a good thing. The way we fight and try to withstand them is a bad thing. There is a rythym to life and the rythym of God is the best melody around. Listen for it. Its subtle and overwhelming at the same time. It covers your feet with a trickle and it knocks you over and sends you tumbling. Wave after wave, never ceasing and too big to see the totality. After an encounter with the ocean and the beach comes the attempt to wash it away in the form of a shower. The problem is that try as you might the ocean is now apart of you. The experience stays with you - becomes a part of you. Imprinted on your soul. The ocean gets to me that way. It lasts. It hangs around swirling inside of me drawing me back to it. God too. Once you taste Him, feel Him, brush against Him, become exhausted fighting Him you know. You know Him. You gain a little more understanding of Him. But then comes the thirst. The thirst for Him - a God sized extra large soda in the biggest big gulp cup. Ocean size that please - I don't want to get thirsty later. If the whole ocean was in a cup and God drank it would it even quench His thirst? Would it wet His whistle? I don't think so, but it's fun to imagine. Thank you God for the experience of the ocean and what it brings to my mind as I contemplate its vastness. Too big, too unexplainable, too wonderful, alot like You Lord.
I had a 'weekend away' with many members from my church this past weekend, all men. The theme of the weekend was "Running To Win" and the teachings were centered around the idea of winning in life as you draw close to God, His Word and live for Him. Oh there were competitions, some were official. Basketball, Wallyball, HorseShoes and a strange Baptist tradition callled a sword drill. I don't know if it is Baptist but it just seems like it could be.
There were also unofficial competitions. Who can smell the worst? Who can eat the most? Who can laugh the most? (We all tried hard to win this one!) Who can have the most body hair? The least? Who is the oldest? Who is the youngest? There were also subtle events that were sneaky and quiet. These events come about when any group gets together and insecurity comes around looking for someone to eat. Competitions like, "Who has the appearance of a man?", or "Who can pretend the best at having it all together?" or "Who would rather cling to pride than humility?" or "Who can crack the best joke and hurt someone and get the most laughs?" Oh yea, I entered some of these games and might have even won a few, unofficially.
I had to ask forgiveness this morning from my two daughters. Over the weekend, I the one who was given the task of protecting my children, failed. As I was having the conversation and trying to explain to my girls what I was made aware of by God's grace my youngest looked at me with relief. I kinda imagined her saying in her head, "Dad I'm glad you were paying attention to our struggle." I also imagined her saying some other things but I can't write them here. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't even say the things I thought she would say but my rich vocabulary lends itself to the vulgar. Sorry.
All this to say I was inspired by my Pastor this weekend, at the retreat and during our service on Sunday. We, our church, had a child dedication. The concept is this: I as a mommy or daddy, or hopefully both, will do my best to raise my child(ren) unto God and the rest of God's family there will do their collective best to help. Being a man, a real man doesn't involve basketball, horseshoes or smelling bad. (Usually not the last one for sure!) Being a man does involve a continual submission to God, His Word and a servants heart in providing life giving opportunities for those you may have the ability to influence. If we as men could be hooked up to a MAN-meter at the end of each day, what score would you get? Now don't get confused, God is the only one able to read, score or tabulate the results. There may even be a few hanging chads! The heart of the only complete man to walk on the planet was overflowing with love - Jesus' heart spilled over every day and sometimes drown people who were so thirsty for love and affirmation. Go get a "Jesus is my hero" poster and put it up in the room of your heart. Then you can begin to imitate a real man, God in the bod, Jesus Christ, inventor of the MAN-meter.
I had the opportunity to visit a great number of my family at a reunion in, yup, you guessed it Olean, NY. Such an emotionally charged weekend. We had family come from Sacremento, CA for the party. Upon leaving, as it always happens, it takes me a while to keep myself together. The tears flow and the raw pain of separation takes me over. By the time I get about an hour away I have calmed down and I can focus on the task at hand - a 6+ hour drive home. Our Pastor last week talked about heaven and used the Bible to describe it. He also stated that heaven is home for those who have trusted Jesus Christ as their Savior. It hit me that even the pain of joyfulness will fade in Heaven. The joy of joy will be forgotten. In heaven the best part about it is being there is direct concact with Jesus Himself. When I returned home to Baltimore after the reunion my wife told me lots of people were asking about me and that they missed me and hoped that I had a great time. I did. What is also awesome is that when I'm gone from my usual place here on the planet people notice. I'm missed. People hope or wish or want me to be where I typically am so that we as a group of people here in Baltimore can move along life together. What a comfort, what a blessing, what a sweet feeling. I guess I fit here and when I'm not around people notice. As hard as it is to be pulled away from blood relatives it is equally easy to be welcomed home by BLOOD relatives, Jesus Christ BLOOD relatives. Thank you to all my family at Lifebridge Church for the love you pour out and shower me with. When we get to heaven all this life's pain and joy will be something we can't remember. I think the Bible says that "every tear will be wiped away." We may only need tear ducts here on the planet because of the amount of pain present in this life. Here's to family, to BLOOD and to heaven - may you on your journey get in touch with Jesus and if you are in the family, spread His love, we all need healing.
I have a few days off and have taken a trip to Olean, New York. The ride North was a delight because of a CD book. (Thank you Beth) I'm staying in the former house of my mothers parents, William and Mary Cashimere. My parents met some time ago at a polka dance? That's the story. See my dad was attending college at St. Bonaventure University playing football and my mom, the oldest of 9 must have seen my dad and fell in love. The Univeristy is in Olean New York and that's why I'm here. Sure there is golf and family, great food, a pace of life that incites peace but something happened to me this morning. As I decended the stairs to the bathroom on my grandparents renovated former house I greeted my cousins wife sitting in a rocking chair in the same place my grandmother used to sit. Now when I used to visit as a boy I would see my grandmother sitting in the same place and she would have a rosary in her hand and be in what I thought was a trance. It occured to me that maybe she was having thoughts of her grandchildren as she prayed and maybe she was asking God to pursue me and help me with my life. Maybe I feel so good here because my grandmother was actually setting me up for a relationship and life with God that extended beyond her years. Maybe this relaxed, peaceful, "right" feeling I get when I visit Olean, New York connects me with God's plans that in grandmothers heart were a spritual birthplace of sorts. As I type this I can hardly see the keys because tears are streaking down my face. Overwhelming would be a close descriptive. Can you go back in your own life and get a glimpse of where your spritual birthplace may have begun? I think this just happened to me and wow - prettty cool. It wasn't until the Fall of 1992 when I formally gave my life to God and realized I need a savior to free me from trying to please God. Couldn't ever do enough, couldn't ever live right enough. Look back today - see any traces of people who may have had a hope for you to connect with God? You may be surprised - some of those old, seemingly out of touch relatives my have kept you in mind as they prayed - asking the God of the universe to invade your life, give it real purpose, give it real meaning. Thanks Grandma for praying for me and having hope - I think your hope was based in a God who can handle a little upstart, the youngest son of your oldest child.
I saw the bumper sticker today - "Coexist." This bumper sticker spells the word 'coexist' with symbols representing many different religions. I'm not sure the intention behind the bumper sticker but I think I have an idea . There are people in the world who try really hard to become all things to all people. I think the designer of this particular bumper sticker has an agenda. I also think the point of the bumper sticker taken really literally is almost goofy. We, all people, all religions, all genders, all ages, all colors DO COEXIST. It seems rather obvious. Are there people on other planets who have moved there because they can't coexist anymore? OK one down, one to go. The other point here is that behind this clever descriptive sticker there is a plea for acceptance. I accept that other people, cultures, religions exist and I accept that they usually have a unique perspective other than mine. (Also pretty obvious if you are keeping track) What I think is behind this bumper sticker is this - (Almost like a disclaimer) - "Each symbol on this bumper sticker represents a belief system that should be given the respect is deserves. In most cases the religion represented is the creative work of some human who has been dead for some time and what that person stood for is really nice. Be nice to all the people and let them think what they want to think but don't ever say anything to them that might cause them to struggle about the idea of why they are here on the planet in the first place." My mother in law was chatting with one of her great grandchildren and I heard about the conversation. The bottom line is this, once you are old enough you should make good choices so that who you believe in and how you live should glorify God the Father of Jesus Christ and believe that Jesus is the only ticket to heaven and the real reason a person should make such choices on how to live. This caused quite a stir in the family because my wife's sister was sure that all kids go to heaven. How is a child supposed to get close to the God of the universe when even bumper stickers suggest that "It's OK to think whatever, good luck when you die." It's a shame that so much tolerance exists at the expense of good discussion. At the very sign of a different viewpoint the blood pressure shoots up and tensions rise. Maybe the bumper sticker should say, "Let conversations COEXIST about the different ways in which God had been described and misunderstood throughout the ages. Because there are so many ways people understand who God is make room in a tolerant way to be patient in the wacky and sometimes humorous light in which God is portrayed. Please disregard what most people generally describe as God's book, the Bible, because this would cause way too much stress and possibly make us all boring." OK so I'm not so good at writing bumper stickers. Here's my point. We DO coexist, God watches us and must have strong neck muscles , He must shake His head all day long and He might even mutter things like, "Isn't it clear, my Son, their sin, mm.." Sorry COEXIST bumper sticker folks, I've got you figured out. It's a sad word on humanity, let 'em live and die but don't let 'em think.
I have the opportunity to be around children in my job and at my church and well, in my neighborhood. I love to watch parents interact with their children because it reminds me of the war. I describe the war as the ultimate goal of parenting to get their children to be more obedient to God and less obedient to themselves and their own selfish actions, desires call it what you will. The problem is that in me being able to point out the obvious shortcomings of other parents I forget that I too am a general in my own army. What is interesting about parenting is that most parents think they have a corner on the market. I see in other parents behaviors that I would like to avoid and I see some I wish I had. How about you? Do you realize that you as a parent are in a 'war?' Do you realize that you are also in a personal war to be more obedient to God and set a good example to your children too. Ouch....The act of disciplining our children is the easy part really. All of us are critics and pointing out faults in others, even out own children (and some really like this part of parenting by the way) is natural. Remember the war today - remember your own personal war first though. It's easy to be hard on someone else, easy to be easy on yourself. Don't think that by pointing out the faults in others it is some kind of gift you have. It's not. It's just annoying and unholy, ungodly really more like what a friend of mine call being an 'ass'aholic. (Thank you Bobby.) Fight today, but choose your battles wisely.
My oldest child turned 12 the other day. I've been a dad for 12 years? There are times when I feel very dad-like and there are times when I feel very not dad-like. I can remember the late night/early morning sleep interuptions when my daughter wanted to eat at about 2:00am. Those were special moments when I felt like me and my daughter were the only 2 people on the planet. Instead of a loving look or a sigh that would melt your heart now a days I get "I'm bored", "buy me something", "my little sister is a pain", "where's my cell phone?". It seems like the basics of communication still need to be voiced. All the reminding about the messy rooms, the attitude, the drama, the reminding about the messy room and the attitude and the drama over and over seem to become tiresome. Every now and then a spark cathes me off-guard and I see something in my child I haven't seen before. I think, now don't quote me here, that I may see some growing up? It is exciting and painful at the same time. I know my children love me, need me and want to make me relativly happy but when those moments of, dare I say, maturity peek through it is new and confusing. I had to drop off my daughter at a camp she is working at, she got out of the car, walked into the building and dissappeared from my sight. I was stunned. Maybe I have been doing something right as a daddy - and maybe God has similar experiences about me and my so-called moments of maturity. I bet He smiles and feels so proud when I do the right thing or trust Him or read His word or pray or remember to include all I have learned from our times together and I allow what I learned to steer my decisions. My daughter makes me proud, more often that I let on and I should remind her more that I am proud papa. How old are your kids readers? You have been a parent that long and I bet there are some things your kids have done that stop you in your tracks in a good way. Tell 'em. Remind them that they are doing well and making you smile when you think of them. Mostly tell them you love them, over and over and over. They need to hear it, I need to hear it. "Everybody shares the need to be loved," thankyou Toby Mac. Risk today and communicate love, God would be so proud of you.
I had a 3 year period when I was Mr. Mom. Our oldest child had been born, I was not making enough money to be the sole financial guy but my wife had an excellent job. Most of the pressure I felt to get a "real" job was from inside my own Christian family. Strange that sacrifice is perceived differently. I grew during those Mr. Mom years because the reality of caring for someone other than myself became real clear. Babies are helpless at birth. Human babies take a long time to learn skills that help us as big people allow for their independence. I remember 3 AM feedings when it really seemed like my daughter and I were the only two people on the planet. I remember walks, wobbly ones where my daughter did not know I was behind her but her attempts to master walking and not falling began to emerge. I feel very much like my daughter in my attempts to walk with God and not stumble. I also felt like I my skinned knees would never heal. The process has been long and short, difficult and easy rewarding and disappointing. The short, difficult and disappointing are ALL me. God is never is far away. At the times when we think we are out there making a difference, functioning on our own He is very close. One of the biggest lies we like to tell ourselves is that we did it alone. Now there are plenty of decisions and screw ups that we really own but usually an excuse is close by. A quote that many parents hear, very similar to the first time this phrase was used is "It's not my fault." Why are the bad times and screw ups always accompanied by this little phrase? Why are good times and accomplishments not also accompanied by the same phrase? It really isn't my fault because the unseen presence of God never leaves us. Next time you do something great remember God was with you and had something if not everything to do with it. He gives us skills, He orchestrates circumstances, He allows for opportunities so we can feel good about our abilities and so we can say "It's not my fault." I'm sure not many of us remember learning how to walk but He was there too. Our first steps were known by the Creator, even our first 'spiritual' steps. Walk tall today in the knowledge that God is close and our baby steps continue to gain stability.
I was thinking about Saturday Night Live and the banter between Dan Ackroid (Spelling? (which is questionable most of the time for me anyway)) and Gilda Radner in a skit called "Point/Counter Point." Funny stuff. How about the conversations between Muhhamad Ali and Howard Cosell. (Spelling? again!) Not exactly funny but entertaining. How about a conversation between Jesus and anyone He spoke to. "You don't have to sell your body for value anymore," "You can now see with eyes that have never worked before," "You should have a career change and fish on the land with me," "You are free to love, everyone and forgive them." Jesus offers not only a clean start but the ability to create a difference because we are following His lead. Using His power to choose differently, His abilities in our hearts reach out into a world in so much pain. I watched a video this morning of a man hit by a car caught on a surveliance camera. Ouch to say the least. Blindsided, totally. Are there conversations you have that are similar? Are they explosive? Do they blindside you? Our words have weight. They can be as intense and powerful as a Mack truck going 100 miles an hour or as soft and gentle as a breeze in the Summertime. Jesus calls us to be an agent here and now for Him. To remind everyone we meet that He is near. God has come down from Heaven and He wants us to make our world like Heaven. It's not going to work every time but the hope should exist in our hearts. Our words can point to the reality that God is as close as our breath, and His presence is near. Not off in some fluffy cloud-like paridise but in our office, our supermarket, in our alleys, in our back-yard, in our car as we drive, everywhere. God is talking to us and we should talk back. In our conversation we may hear explosive words from Him. "You know you don't have to.....(fill in the blank) anymore. I can help you stop. It really isn't necessary anyway. Why don't you keep me in mind most of the time and we'll have a grand time together! We could go on an adventure, you and I. Does that sound like fun?" God waits for us to engage Him. I think He is a conversationalist. I know the book is written but the dialog continues. Talk to the Lord today, He may surprise you by His response. It may not even sound like what others have told you about Him.
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